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AJ's Journal

Sunday, January 25, 2004


~Don't you hate when people IM you and you don't know who they are then then while they are trying to figure out who you are they give your name to their friends and then they write you....that's really dumb! Two people did that to me tonight and I have no clue who they are! But anyways...

I'm not in respiratory anymore! I had a change of heart. I really should have looked into it before I just jumped in and decided that that was what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. So this semester I am deciding. I just got Eric a live journal tonight. That's fun! :) lol 

My car still sucks....sometimes the heat works, sometimes it doesn't.  What a moody car! Must be a girl..lol. I wish I could get a new car. If I could have anything, I would want a jeep. :) It runs in the family.

In a few weeks Eric and I will have been together for 1 year!!!! Isn't that exciting?! :) I love him so much. I can't believe that we had so much fun when we first got together and the fun hasn't stopped! He's so wonderful. I can't wait until I get out of school and we start getting somewhere with our life together!!!

I'm glad that my brother is happy once again! I like her too...that's always good! Always makes things a little easier as we all know!

I hate working at Hannaford! Once again another incentive to get going with this school thing! I hate the people I work with too. I like some people of course but there are a few that I just can not stand! Stupid fucken fagget GREG,....Aaron Wright...enough said...dumb triple F Amber..and her stupid doofy boyfriend John! They are so annoying and disgusting! Anyways,....to end on a good note...I'm going to go brush my teeth and cuddle up to the man of my dreams and have wonderful happy dreams....

Current mood: loved

Thursday, November 13, 2003

9:14PM - Update

I haven't written in here forever. Here's what's going on in my life:

~I'm attending school for Respiratory Therapy
~I am still with the love of my life...going on 10 months...
~Car is still running (crossing fingers)
~House sitting this weekend for the inlaws...hehe
~My's recovering nicely
~Happy as I'll ever be!!!

School is a lot harder than I had expected. I wish that I had started classes sooner. So I could have gotten the swing of things, instead of being shoved right into it with 7 classes. I'm so glad that I can just do 7 next semester instead of the initial 8!

Things are going so great right now. I hope they never stop!!!!!!!

Current mood: satisfied

Saturday, April 5, 2003


It's gross and snowy outside.... :( The roads are yucky. I went sliding in my car today! not as fun as it sounds! ;) Day off so that's cool. Just hang out and sleep and watch tv and stay in warm house :) NICE.....

Current mood: cold

Sunday, March 30, 2003

11:56AM - ~*~Feeling Great~*~

I am so happy. I have never been this happy ever before in my entire being. I have been shown what love truely is and I'm not afraid of it. It's a great feeling.

I went flying the other day. It was awesome. It was in Eric's dad's paraglider high flyer thing. I don't know exactly what it is but it looks like a go-cart with a big prapeller(?) on the back with a parachout(?) on the back which is what makes it fly. It doesn't go very fast and It was really friggen cold up there but it was an awesome experience. All the houses were like one inch by two inches. It was neat. People looked like crumbs on the ice. Awwww it was amazing! Definetly something I would recommend for everyone to at least try once. Hopefully if everything goes right I am going sky diving this summer. It'll be great. The heights didn't scare me at all what so ever. amazing is all i can say.

Work is ok. I don't want to work there anymore...not enough money for me.

That's all I have to say.


Current mood: ecstatic

Monday, March 10, 2003


~Got Car.

~Putting it on the road.


~Day off.

~Classes are going well.

~Doing good.


Thursday, February 6, 2003

8:17AM - ~UPDATE~

I haven't written in here forever....so I have a few things to talk about. Well for one, I FINALLY got my license, now the neverending saga of searching for a car. I had the same guy that I had before and he was really nice. It was kind of a disaster though over all because right when we went to start the test, we were sitting in my mom's jeep. He was like "ok, now when you get to the end of the drive way your gonna go left." So I put it in gear....THE WRONG GEAR and smashed backwards into the snow bank. Yeah, good start! Then when I pulled over to do the backing up thing, I turned my head and listened to him tell me "i'll tell you when to stop", so Off I went,....NEVER putting it into reverse and I went flying forward. What an IDIOT! But he just laughed about it and it was all good. At least he still gave it to me. I was gonna cry if I didn't get it. So that's that.

I started classes. I don't know if I already talked about that but I am taking classes. Not college but classes to help me out. I am talking an adult ed class at messalonskee for chemistry since I never took it in high school. And I'm also taking a class to help me get ready to take my placement tests. By taking this FREE class, I get two free courses at KVTC. So that's cool.

Other than that, I've been working, and working....and working! That's pretty much it.

You know what makes me mad? I hate when you have a friend that it only seems convenient to hang out with me when they are not getting along with their girlfriend. It's kinda really queer. Cause then I feel like they are just hanging out with me to get back at their girl. And that's not fair. It never used to be like that. Whatever.

OH, and I am getting my tattoo February 13th...A WEEK AWAY!!! I was so excited but now I'm kinda scared. oh well...it'll be cool. BUt $140 is not quite what I was expecting it to cost....

Current mood: happy

Wednesday, January 8, 2003


I talked with a good friend last night for a long time and found out some things that I never knew before. I wish that some people would just let me do what I want. I know people have their own oppinions about different things and people but I have my own too. Not everyone experiences the say things. I just hope that someday people will understand.

I had to hurt someone's feelings yesterday. I felt pretty bad about it but I just don't want to be with them. I don't want to be with anyone. Well sometimes I do,...but I think it's just because I feel like I'm lacking a piece of myself. And sometimes I think that someone can fill in the hole. You know? Anyways, I'll be fine.

Thanks Justin for helping me out and sharing thoughts on life with me. I hope that I could help at least a little. I'm always here. And I know your always there whether it's talking or playing the part of doctor trozzi. :) *wink*

I had a pretty boring day today. I didn't do too much. I'm bored. I wish that I had something to do. But I don't see it happening. It's a sad thing. My last day off until a couple days and I'm left alone at home. DAMN IT!! lol...oh well. Life goes on.

Well that's all I have to say about that...bye

Current mood: bitchy

Tuesday, January 7, 2003



Work sucks.
Bills suck.
Hospital's are nice to me. Make me feel better.

Thursday, January 2, 2003

4:23PM - WHY????

~*~I hate dreaming now. When ever I close my eyes, it brings nothing but bad memories back. Things that I'm trying to forget. It's hard but oh well, I'll get over it. I'm a big girl.

I hope that someday everyone that has done something awful to someone will pay. HARD. Anyone who has ever thought that they were the shit and are gonna find out the hard way when they are knocked to the ground. I'm gonna be there though. I'm gonna be there to laugh in the face and say "I told you so!" Fucken Ass Holes.

I wish that I could figure out my life. I probably shouldn't be in such a hurry to figure it out, because once it's all layed out in stone, there will be no more surprises. And I don't want that, BUT I do wish that I could at least get things in order. You know? Just make things at least start to go in the right direction.

I hope that someday it will happen...~*~

Current mood: contemplative

Sunday, December 29, 2002


~*~Sometimes, you trust people that you really shouldn't. But I do learn from things so I have learned once again. I thought that I could actually trust a couple of people to drink near, since I don't drink near people I don't trust and I thought I could trust them. WELL, needless to say...that was a MISTAKE. I will never drink near anyone but the people that I have been drinking near ever again. I hate when you think someones your friend and then its a big kick in the face when you realize that their not. so.....*sigh*.....never again will I do that. But since this experience, I will no longer be surrounding myself with the WRONG people. I never once in my life thought that that would have happened. It sucks.

But aside from that, I have had a good couple of days. Myself and my signifigant other(at the time) had a talk and realized that things just weren't working. And I'm glad that things ended the way that they did. We both realized that I like the gap and he liked guns. LOL... It's hard to bring some topics up in conversation but because of this, I think that it will be a lot easier in the future. There still is hope!

I went bowling with the girls last night. It was cool. I never have gone bowling with Caitlin before. Oddly enough, since we've been friends forever, we have never gone bowling. WEIRD. But I had fun. It sucked when I almost ripped my nails off. Fucken acrylic. grrrrr....

My grandmother and myself had a little pow-wow involving ripping our nails off and lots of pain. It sucked. I don't think that I'm getting my nails done in a LONG time! No more. It sucks.

But that's all that I have to say for now. I'll update later. ~*~

Current mood: confused

Wednesday, December 11, 2002


~*~Well I've had quite a bit of excitement these past couple days. I spent a long weekend with my man...it was fun. I dragged him along shopping with amber, my mom, and myself at Old Navy. It was great fun. WE went Christmas shopping. My mom had Amber and I pick stuff out that we wanted for christmas. Good thing we got a shopping cart! Well maybe it wasn't such a good thing for my mom's check book. Then we met up with my brother for a little olive garden...mmmm... it was GREAT!!!!

Caitlin and I went shopping the other night because money was pushed into my pocket so I had something to shop with. But went to walmart in augusta, B & B WORKS, and Hannaford. We were at Wal-Mart until um...11:30. What dork. Who shops that late? I mean really. But I got a few things. Oh well, there's more pay checks for me to recieve before christmas. So..there is still hope. I wish my brother and Amber were easier to shop for..grrrrr...

Yesterday I was really sick. I was puking all night and it was awful. I thought I was going to die. I couldn't eat for like two days. It was awful. I slept like ALL day. But I stopped puking around noon. So that was cool. It was nice though because since I was home, my parents and I sat down and had a long talk about stuff and it was cool. Kinda nice to catch up with the rents. :)

But over-all, things are good in the AJ Department. Not quite in the Christmas mood yet but getting there...money just sucks. That's all. But hopefully everything works out...~*~

Current mood: cold

Thursday, December 5, 2002

9:05AM - ~....what a sweetie....~

~*~Things are going good right now. I work with this guy at Hannaford and I kinda thought he was really cute when I first met him and he was wicked funny. Well one night, Danielle tried to fix us up. I had mentioned to her that I liked him and I thought it would be cool to hang out. And when we both were about to leave, since we just so happened to have the exact same schedule, Danielle asked him what he was doing that night. And he said nothing, just prob. going home and watching a movie and it just so happened those were my plans for the evening as well. And so he asked if I wanted to go over and hang out. I was so happy because I had been talking about wanting to hang out with him for like ALL DAY! So I fought with my parents because they came and picked me up from work and it was snowing really bad so I asked them if it was cool if I went with him. Well my mom threw a fit because they came all the way out to get me. At the time I was only thinking of me so I was a little argumentative. But then I realized you know, they came to get me and that was nice of them. So I was going to go tell him to nevermind and we'd have to do it another time until my mom turned around and was like "take your coat asthamatic idiot" and I was just like FUCK THIS, I was trying to make things cool but she had to say something stupid, so anyways, I went with him. We went to his house and it was wicked cool. I got to see the rest of Lord Of the Rings. I don't think I liked it too much. But anyways, so he brought me home and before I got out of the car he kissed me. I didn't expect him to so it was kinda weird. But yeah, that was cool. He wanted me to give him my number so we could hang out again. Well I guess that he never thought that I actually wanted to hang out until I talked to him again and told him that I did....so...now...we are together. Our first actual date we went to the movies and it was cool. We saw Die Another Day. It was kinda slow. But it was cool. And after we had talked and decided that we were together, the next day when he came to pick me up from work he had 4 roses for me. I was so surprised. It was funny because he called me at work to see if it was OK to bring me out to dinner that night. Well YEAH...dinner's good. SOOOO he brought me to Olive Garden and that was really cool because I LOVE olive garden. So then after that we rented a movie and watched it as his house. Then he brought me home....Ever since we've started hanging out and stuff I've learned sooo much about him. It's cool because we can just sit there for hours and talk about everything. I really like him a lot and I think it's cool that we work together. Something different. So tonight we are hanging out and stuff, then tomorrow we're gonna hang out for a while sometime. And then Saturday we're going fourwheelilng all day at his parents house. It's gonna be cool. I'm excited.

At work there is so much drama...I hate it. A shift leader named greg who is "special" is such a prick. He is trying to get my friend who is a shift leader fired! That's not cool. And so I have to write a statement of what he said to me in order to help out my friend. It sucks that people have to not be cool! Oh well not exactly my problem.

But today I get to work with my sweetie and it'll be fun. :) Hopefully we get a break together....I'll update after my awesome weekend! ~*~

Current mood: cheerful

Wednesday, December 4, 2002


~*~ I'm Happy Once Again~*~

Current mood: happy

Sunday, November 24, 2002


~*~ Well, Friday night I stayed over Matt's house. Yeah, Jose` doesn't exactly agree with me. So I had a very eventful night. I was so gone...yeah. It was awful. Learned a good leason though. :) Never do that many of Jose`. It doesn't work out for the better.

Saturday Caitlin picked me up and we went out to eat and met up with Erica. She wants me to move in with her but it's really bad timing. I have a lot going on and being on my own wouldn't help my situation any. But if things weren't going on like they are...I'd do it in a heart beat. It's a really cute place. Anyways, I hope she finds someone to live with her. Then, we went over to Matt's house to wait around to pick her sister up at 4. I think Troy's girlfriend is so dumb. She had stupid nails and I can't stand that rotted tooth that sticks out in the front. I just want to pick at it! lol...anyways, then Caitlin and I went and got our nails done. Mine came out awesome...caitlin's...um...not so good. There is too much white but anyways, then we went and got her sister and a friend and drove out to Rome. Yeah...awesome Rome,...we had no power. So her little sister and her friend didn't want to stay at the house alone so we had to bring them with us. We went to go see Harry Potter, and go out to eat...Yeah Olive Garden on a saturday nihgt...RIGHT....So we went to the Ground Round...it was alright. Harry Potter was a 3 hour movie. We went to the 8:30pm show...yeah we didn't get out until um....11:30.

Today I helped my mom make pie's for Thanksgiving...well actually I just talked to her while she made them...lol...Caitlin came over with the child...it was cool. Kaylee was scared of the dogs. So they left...and I went along with them. We made potatoes and ate chips. That's about it. So that's my day pretty much.

I can't stand fucken stupid people. I think it's completely retarded to believe rumors and shit without going to the source and finding out what really happened. I think that people that throw friendships away like they never even happened are fucken pieces of shit. I think that people are so dumb. Stupid kids...

I can't wait to go to work and find out what happened this weekend with Nicole! :) ~*~

Current mood: annoyed

Friday, November 22, 2002


~*~Yesterday I worked until 11pm. It sucked kinda. But it was cool that Nicole was working because we got to talk about stuff. I bought a fleece at TJ Maxx yesterday for 20 bucks, it's cool. I went to Bath and Body Works and got everything possible for Gleen Clover Aloe. It smells so good. I got paid yesterday...obviously.

I had a weird dream about a guy at my work named John. I was where he was staying...and he was staying with what looked like Kevin P's dad and some lady that he isn't really married to. He was a doctor and was keeping John there for observation. Why he was there for observation was because he had little heads all over him that looked just like him. And for a while they disappeared and he said it was because the heads went to take a shower....yeah...fucked up. And at one point I saw Kevin's dad in a pair of flashy blue panties. It was funny yet very gross. Fucked up though. Everytime I stay at Amber's I have fucked up dreams.

Today I have to work at 10:30-7:30 and Nicole is bringing in a picture of her fiance's best friend to see what I think... we'll see. ~*~

Current mood: sleepy

Thursday, November 21, 2002


~*~Justin, You said that you wanted me to continue using this journal but you never comment on anything so i don't see the point. Oh well....

Yesterday was cool. I went with Caitlin to a doctors appt. and it was boring...then we went to the maine childrens home so she could get recommendation letters for school, then we went to waterville high school to see Jenna's baby. She is so cute. Huge eyes...anyways, I went and talked to my old cheering coach and she asked how things were and it was cool. She was so happy to see me. She asked if I'm still not with Ken and I thought that was funny. Normally people ask if your still with someone. I dunno. It was funny. Anyways, the coolest thing in the world happened. She offered me a trip to Cancun for like $450 plus plane tickets and I could bring who ever I want and we would have a condo and it would be so fucken cool. She just has to talk to her husband and make sure it's cool. So I'm so excited. It'll be awesome. The question is who to bring...? And I think it's DUMB that my brother doesn't want to go because he doesn't want to go on a plane. What a dork. I invited him and he would only have to pay like a hundred bucks and it would be awesome but nooooo he's scared to fly! What a dork. lol...I think it would be fucken awesome to bring my big brother with me. I mean come on how many people can say they want to hang out with their brother? That's what I thought. Anyways. that's cool and I hope everything works out.
So after that, I went to burger king and got ketchup on my new white shirt and that made me mad...oh well. Then we went to go visit Brian at work since I haven't seen him forever and I'm glad I did because we hung out last night. We went to go see "8 Mile" and it was FUCKEN AWESOME!!! I loved it. It was so funny. So yeah, then we went to his house and played pool on his new pool table. It was fun but I suck wicked bad at pool sometimes and last night was definetly one of those nights. But it was fun just hanging out and shootin the shit.

So now I'm gonna go take a shower and then go to Augusta with my brother and go shopping and probably go to Olive Garden...it's pay day! So yeah...that's all I have to say.~*~

Current mood: blah

Saturday, November 16, 2002


~*~My horoscope is so right...

Maintain a positive attitude and things will naturally flow your way. Tell a few jokes and keep things light and energetic. You will find that you can multi-task very well, and that you have the built-in ability to make everyone around you smile. Don't shy away from things, move toward them. Put away your self-doubt and be more proactive in your approach to everything you encounter.

I had such a good day today! Smiles all around...~*~



Today I had a really good day. I had to work from 10:30-6:30. It was so busy. You'd swear it was the day before Thanksgiving or something. But I still had a good day. I think it is so funny that I get more hours than some shift leaders. It's because they like me better. I got 31 hours this week. :)

My brother came and picked me up from work and brought me over to Jess's house. That was very nice of him. Jess made my favorite meal in the entire world for dinner. Ribs and cheesy potatoes. mmmmmmmmmmmm....they were so good! Greg has left for a concert so it's just us and the kids tonight. Tomorrow my dad is going to pick me up and we're going to fill out paper work for college. I'm excited.

Current mood: happy

Friday, November 15, 2002


~*~Well a lot has happened in the little life of AJ....geesh...

To start, I got my bill for the hospital...$742...yeah..well I guess it's better than a grand which that's what I thought it was going to be...so I guess that's good.

At work a guy came in and gave me his number...I was like um...sure..anyways, I was like well we could be friends or whatever because I'm not looking to be with anyone. Well I called and left a message because I got his machine. Then I called again because I didn't know if he got the message or not. Well when I called the second time he was there. YEAH....fucken gross...the guy looked like he was about um..23-24....WRONG...the guys was 37. How Gross is that? Fucken Nasty. And I was like, dude, I'm a baby compared to you. That's weird. Anyways, I talked to him for a while trying to figure out why the guys wasn't married yet or whatever. He was trying to get me to tell him where I live and shit. I definetly didn't tell him. So then I hung up and that was that. Then he comes into my work the next time I worked and said that when ever I get out of work, I could go over his house. Um..RIGHT...YUCKY ICKY GROSS NASTY!!!!!! Yeah well needless to say, I DIDN'T go. When I came home last night, my dad was on the phone and said that that guy's girlfriend was on the phone. I got on the phone and talked to her. Apparently, this creepy 37 year old has been dating this girl for a year and is sleeping with like 4 other girls. She said that he pushed her the other day and riped out stitches that she had when he pushed her, he chased her across 5 towns with her son in the car and he is has stockish tendencies. She told me to watch out for him because he will probably try to find my house and probably won't leave me alone at work. So I spoke with the shift leaders at work and they know about it so if he comes in and bothers me he will be removed from the store. So I haven't talked to him since that first and only time I did....hopefully he doesn't call or come around again!

On a happier note, Caitlin and I went to KVTech and got all kinds of information on school and financial aid and stuff and if everything goes as planned then in January I will be starting classes to become a Radiologist. I think that it would be so cool. I am so excited. I'm actually doing something cool for myself that will help me out in the long run. It also helps that Caitlin and I are going for the same thing so we can encourage each other and study together and stuff.

I'm so happy! I'm finally doing something to better myself. I also am going to send in for my license test again and hopefully I get it this time. I know what I did wrong and I won't do it again. Nothing was too huge so I can fix it.

I talked to Joe on the phone the other night and it was awesome. I think that the whole "being friends" issue is going to work out...I think...I haven't talked to him in a few days and I miss him. I wish that he would call me or something. The same goes for Justin, I wish that either of them would call me. Their my friends and I care to hear from them.

Speaking of hearing from friends, when I was working the other night I saw my friends boyfriend and found out that she didn't go away to college and that she's still around and the next day she called me. It was nice to get caught up again. Hopefully things don't fizzle out again.

Oh, and another thing, My friend Renee came into the store the other day and told me that her dad beat the shit out of her. You should have seen her face. It was all bruised and shit. She's a tough girl though. I work with a guy that lives with her and he said that he was in the car when they were fighting and he heard her dad hit the floor from inside the car so I know she kicked the shit out of him. Good thing she's the ways she is. I could never be that tough. She's a good friend to have. :) That just sucks. Also becaus her brother is in Italy and in the army and so much has happened and it must be hard to hear about all this and stay in Italy. Too bad. When I first heard her parents were getting a divorce I was sad, but now that I know the REAL way her father is I'm glad. I wonder if he's ever hit her mom before....? ~*~

Current mood: bored

Monday, November 11, 2002


~*~Well lets see...last night I worked until 5pm...so that wasn't too bad. The night before I worked until 11. That sucked because I had to get up early to go to work the next day but oh well. That's the working life I guess. I stayed over Matt and Christine's house last night. Jason, Steve, Brandon, and Brandon's brother came over for like two seconds. Keith was up from Rockland. It was cool. They were all drinking and I wasn't because I figured it probably wasn't a good idea since I'm on medication and stuff. Oh well, maybe next time. But no one got too screwed up. It was funny. When Keith walked into the living room to introduce himself to Brandon and then, he dropped his drink and broke it on the floor it was so funny because it was like " Hi, I'm Keith...*SMASH*"..anyways, I thought it was funny.

Today, Mat and Amber went home in the morning and I stuck around. We went out to eat for chinese and then waited around for like two hours for "The Ring" to start playing. It was alright. Nothing too wonderful like eveyone made it sound. I didn't cry. It only jumped me once and that was only because it was gross...The ending sucked. But while we were waiting we went to Barnes and Nobles, The Pet store, OLD NAVY :), Micheal's, and um...that's it. It was cool. We stayed in Barnes and Nobles for a while. That helped pass time. Christine and I looked at yoga books. We're gonna pick up the sport. :) sound like fun.

But so now I'm home and waiting to get into my bed and pop in a movie and fall asleep. I don't have to work tomorrow so that's cool. A relaxing day for AJ. Sounds good....A day of healing...~*~

Current mood: lazy

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